


Sandwiches & More

by PandaWritesPoorly



Series: With Time & Related Shenanigans [6]
Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Again though that's Claude, Chaos, Chloé Bourgeois Is So Done, Crack Treated Seriously, Dumb Debates, Gen, Marinette Dupain-Cheng Needs a Hug, Marinette is broken, Please reboot her, Survey included, The Relationship Tag Section Scares Me, The world is ending, There's so many people, Which is like basically just Claude™, discussions, for many reasons
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-16
Updated: 2020-04-16
Packaged: 2021-03-01 19:28:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 871
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23682397
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PandaWritesPoorly/pseuds/PandaWritesPoorly
Summary: Claude has a new discussion point.
Relationships: All the characters are friends
Series: With Time & Related Shenanigans [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1677034
Comments: 81
Kudos: 171





	Sandwiches & More

**Author's Note:**

> *looks around, then walks in awkwardly*  
> Heyyyyy, guys. It's uh, been a minute, hasn't it? I kind of disappeared, huh? Still here though! With the whole stay inside thing, I didn't realize how long it had been. The days just kind of blend together.  
> Anyways, I'm here, and I felt bad, so I quick wrote out the debate one-shot I've been excited about so you guys could have something!  
> Sorry about disappearing! Love you guys!! 💕💕💕
> 
> (Google changed my go-to emojis. I don't know how I feel about this.)

Claude is the last to sit down at the lunch table, and the first thing out of their mouth is. “Is pizza a sandwich? Discuss.”

“No!” Marinette and Chloe exclaim.

Felix shakes his head, and Allegra glances down at her pizza, then sets it down. “I’m scared.”

“Why not?” Adrien declares. “Pizza is a sandwich now!”

Allan turns to Claude. “I’m currently with the majority. What points do you have?”

“Why is pizza not an open face sandwich?” Claude challenges, “What actually sets it apart except for the name.”

Marinette looks like her brain has melted, and Chloe shakes her head. “It just isn’t. Pizza is not a sandwich.”

Felix stares at Claude in shock, “I never truly expected one of your little debates to be anything other than chaotic. This is interesting.”

“Ya’ make a good point,” Allan concedes. “Why can’t pizza be a sandwich?”

“Why are _open face_ sandwiches sandwiches? What gives them the qualifications?” Allegra demands.

“The name ‘sandwich’ in their name. Duh.” Adrien rolls his eyes.

She swats him. “So should they even have that name in the first place.”

“Probably not,” Chloe decides, “If it breaks Mari like this.”

Marinette has steepled her fingers in front of her face, leaning forward slightly, and staring a hole into the table blankly, mumbling to herself. It’s hard to make out most of what she’s saying, but at some point she clearly says, “My life is a lie. Maybe. My life has the potential to be a lie.”

Felix pokes her shoulder and gets no response. Claude snorts, “Oops.”

Allan sighs, taking the ice pack out of his lunch box and pressing it into her arm. She hisses, jumping back while he calmly returns it to its spot. Continuing on as though nothing happened, he argues, “But ‘sandwich’ bein’ in their name is important. Clearly it’s an important part of their identity as food, so we can’t just throw it out. Someone called it a sandwich, and society has largely accepted that it is. Throwing it out for the sake of excluding pizza seems extreme.”

“Maybe, but it must be done.” Chloe crosses her arms.

Felix frowns. “He makes a good point though. If we are to accept open face sandwiches as sandwiches, we have no good reason to exclude other dishes - _such as pizza.”_

Chloe gasps, clutching Allegra’s arm. “Oh my Kwami! _Felix_ has turned against us. _Felix and Claude_ are on the same side of one of these debates.”

“The world is ending.” Allegra decides. “Therefore this isn’t an issue any more.”

“It will always be an issue. It will haunt me for eternity,” Marinette whispers.

“Guys,” Sabrina interjects, “Pizza is a sandwich. The real question is if a wrap is a sandwich, and by extension, burritos.”

“YES!” Claude shouts.

“No,” Adrien decides firmly.

Allan stares between the two. “The world really is ending.”

The blond continues, “They’re raviolis.” He takes a decisive bite of his food.

“Nevermind, the earth is spinning and the sun is shining. We’re good.”

“Oh my goodness,” Marinette whispers, “Raviolis are sandwiches.”

“WE HAVE MARI! WOO!!”

“I’m so proud.” Adrien wipes a tear from his eye.

“I’m scared,” Allegra whispers

Chloe shakes her head. _“I’m_ more scared that _Felix_ is legitimately considering this.”

Felix hums in thought. “And what of tacos?”

“Fold over sandwiches,” Allan explains, “The shell just isn’t flexible enough to bend all the way.”

“...”

“OH MY GOD HE’S CONSIDERING IT!”

“I think… arguments could be made, but the intention of the food is important as well. An open face sandwich is a sandwich because that is the intention of its creator - for it to be a sandwich. With pizza, the intention is not there, and by that logic, it is not a sandwich.”

Before anyone can respond to that, Marinette gasps in horror, then, barely above a whisper, contributes, “Frosted jelly donuts are ravioli pizza sandwiches.”

Claude stands, slamming the table with his hands. “MARINETTE CROISSANT DUPAIN-CHENG I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!”

Adrien grabs her shoulders. “Mari me.”

“My life is a _lie._ My parent’s business is a lie. Do we run a pizzeria???” She clutches her face.

Allan carefully separates Adrien from Marinette. “You have my blessing, but she’s having a mid lunch crisis, so hold off on the wedding.”

Sabrina stares at Marinette. _“Do_ they run a pizzeria?”

“No,” Felix corrects, “They do not. Once again, the intention is not for it to be pizzeria, not to mention that simply because pizzas fall into the category of some of their goods, does not make said goods pizzas.”

“Marinette is my padawan, I love her so much and am endlessly proud.” Claude sniffs, dramatically pretending to wipe a tear from his eye.

“Today is a weird day,” Allegra mumbles, “Today is a very weird day, and now I’m scared.”

“Are frosted cookies pizzas?” Adrien asks excitedly.

“Definitely.”

“How did this discussion devolve into breaking down any and all categories between food?” Felix sighs.

“Because Claude started it,” Chloe deadpans.

Marinette falls over into Chloe’s lap. “Am _I_ a ravioli?”

Everyone pauses, and in unison, Claude and Adrien concede, “I mean…”

“No, absolutely not.” Allan interrupts. “Do not even finish that sentence, you two.”

Chloe pats Marinette’s head comfortingly.

**Author's Note:**

> I am Marinette, though I did dial her up to an extreme for Drama Purposes™ and Chaos Potential™.  
> Sooooo? What'd you think? It really started out pretty calm for these guys, but then Marinette broke and Chaos ensued. We all know that when I say 'what do you think' when there's a debate that there will be a survey. [Here it is!!](https://surveyhero.com/c/cd04150a)  
> Edit: Wooo!! It took me long enough, but you can now see the results [here!](https://pandawritespoorly.tumblr.com/post/618691123999899648/wow-look-at-me-fashionably-late-posting-this)
> 
> Love you guys!! I hope you're all safe and well! Hope this could make your quarantine just a little more bearable! 💖💞💝💕
> 
> \---  
> (This part is just my current plans for works, where I've been, what to expect, etc. Feel free to scroll past)  
>   
> I do plan on regularly updating A Shy Sparrow. I don't know how to start the next chapter, so I've been procrastinating big time. That said, I'm posting this partially to peer pressure myself into working on it. It's one thing to not update when you've been MIA for two weeks, it's another when you just posted something saying you'd work on it.  
> My procrastination has consisted of three things for the most part. One, I thought of a new Chloe-centric story that I got really excited about. I was doing a lot of planning for that, so that I could have an idea of the plot by the time I got around to it. Secondly, I randomly got struck with with inspiration to work on an original idea I have, which happens occasionally. There's a few things keeping me from being able to actually build on it, but I've still been doing a little. We'll see how it goes. Thirdly, sometimes I just write random little stories that won't get posted for a number of reasons. I've been doing that, just having fun.  
> There's also the fact that I do have online classes. I am the biggest procrastinator, and online classes are something I could easily get into the habit of pushing aside. I'm trying to avoid having that happen, and it's going well so far!  
> For those of you curious, A Shy 'Sparrow' is looking to be about 10-15 chapters. It could easily end up being less, but that's the assumption I've been working with for this story, and it's looking accurate. Same goes for Memories Never Truly Die, but I haven't written for that as recently so that estimate is a little looser. That Chloe story is up in the air, I'm only in the planning stage.  
> Anyway, I hope to post things more regularly again. With the coronavirus going on, we all need a distraction, and I'd love to be able to provide at least a small one. For those of you wondering, I'm doing just fine! My family and friends are well too. Everyone, stay safe and wash your hands! Do what you can, and stay strong!  
> 💞💞💞💞


End file.
